So...I had a check up today with my endocrinologist who prescribes my testosterone, and it was a very interesting check up.
To be honest there is a part of me right now that is thinking, oh god are you really going to share this?!?, and another part saying "yes do it, it's important, especially if you eventually want to start talking about below the belt things"...for now I'm not so ready to go there. I appreciate that's what a lot of people are curious about, so I will definitely post about it when it's at that time of the process as uncomfortable and exposing that is going to feel.
I now have testosterone levels in my body equal to that of a normal male, so my injections and the level of hormone will remain as is, every 2 weeks. Eventually once I am able to change my sex with medicare (which is allowed after a surgery of adjusting the body to male) I can change to either injections every three months, an implant every six months, or gels. These are all very costly options for a female ($200 per dose vs $30 per dose if male) at present so seems silly to change.
My period has now stopped, and I wont lie this is like, big time yay!! Having injections of testosterone and menstruating at the same time, was a REALLY uncomfortable space to exist in, emotionally and physically. I recall thinking on those days "wow I could really kill 'that person' today ... I mean I won't, but I can totally appreciate how murders in the name of revenge, love, psychosis etc happen...truly". Ability to play and understand a character that murders - tick!
My body appears to be the healthiest it's ever been, blood sugar levels normal, all organ functioning normal, blood pressure 110 over 60 and my cholesterol has dropped from 4.5 to 3.8. This to me is bizarre! If anything my eating habits over the past 2 months have certainly not been the healthiest of my life, mainly from a time factor point of view of being too busy and moving houses a lot, to really prepare a lot of healthy meals. That and my body has really been wanting not so healthy foods. My diet has included quite a bit of McDonalds, Oporto’s, snickers bars, as well as fruit and vege's, so go figure! My weight has increased from 53kgs to 59kgs yet fat content on my body reduced. Not that I'm condoning unhealthy eating but I guess there is also a point in listening to what the body is wanting at the time too...who knows?!
The next step in this process going 'by the book' is to look at chest surgery. Medically termed a double mastectomy with nipple reconstruction if required.
So probably the most interesting thing that surprised my doctor today is this...my breast tissue has shrunk considerably way beyond normal in this short time of being on testosterone for 19 weeks now. Testosterone apparently still converts to oestrogen in breast tissue meaning they don't normally reduce in size all that much. The dramatic change in this short time period has made him think that I may not need chest surgery. I was like...WHAT?!?! :-) This for me today is HUGE; the idea of surgery, anaesthetics antibiotics and hospitals etc scares me to death especially after what I've witnessed in the past with ill family members. I'm still going to meet with a surgeon next month to explore further even though it' still early days as most surgeons don't do surgery unless you've been on testosterone for 12 months or more.
Chest reconstructive surgery is very important for me mainly because I still plan to continue acting and having a chest that is completely 100% male looking is absolutely vital, no exceptions, no scaring, well structured etc. To the point where I'm happy to search for a surgeon globally, spend more money and take my time to find the absolute right person for this. I have watched a lot of YouTube videos and it's like no, no, no not good enough.
So honestly if the body wants to continue to make this shift happen by its own means, especially if it means no or minor nipple cosmetic surgery....YES yes please...really! Obviously more to come on this. The only explanation to this for me right now that seems fitting (and I know a lot of my friends are probably tired of me talking about this :-) is that I have now consistently done a Journey Process at least once a month for the past six years and having integrated this into my life appears to continue to make any change process (mind, body and spirit) in life for me really smooth, it's so amazing! I get why this work is healing people globally from so many diseases, phenomenal!
So more to come on chest stuff after my surgeon appointment on the 16th of Feb.
Thanks again for reading xxx