Andrew Guy

We speak to our NSW #YourChair winner Andrew Guy about his journey as a trans person #TheProjectTV

Posted by The Project on Monday, September 7, 2015

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Why I enjoy reading OSHO :-)

Love has three stages. First you have to learn to love yourself, because only if you love yourself can you love the other. You have to love yourself so much that love starts overflowing. Perhaps that is where you are; you need the other. That is the second stage of love.

Loving the other is a difficult job. Loving oneself is simple. Because the other need not fit with you, need not fulfill your expectations; the other may start power trips, ego trips, all kinds of numbers. And you will need love enough not to be dominated, not to be destroyed by the other; otherwise, the other always destroys it.

Jean-Paul Sartre is not absolutely wrong when he says the other is hell. Alone you can be silent, peaceful. With the other everything becomes difficult, everything becomes a conflict. The very presence of the other makes demands on you. You have to be very compassionate, very kind, not to get caught into an intimate enmity; otherwise the other is going to become a hell to you.

You have to be so loving that your love transforms the other, to such an extent that you can say the other is not hell. You have to be very articulate, very understanding. It is one of the greatest experiments in life. There is no other experiment which is bigger. You have to love in such a way that slowly, slowly it changes the other person, and the other person starts dropping the effort to dominate, the effort to manipulate. It all depends on your love.

In each case you should remember that you have taken the step. It is your experiment, and you have to be grateful to the other that he is participating in your experiment. If you want your experiment to be successful, then you have to go on loving in spite of the other, not bothering about small things.

Only when you can love the other person to such an extent that it becomes a transformation in him or in her does the third stage of love arrive. Then it is not a question of two persons loving each other; then it is love which engulfs two persons and the two persons become, in a certain deeper sense, one whole.

In India we have the statue of Aradhanishwar, half man, half woman. That is the third stage of love: when the man and the woman are no more two persons, they have become half and half into one whole. This third stage of love is, automatically, meditation. One who can reach this stage need not do anything else for meditation; this will be his mysticism. This was the whole approach of tantra, to reach to the third stage of love; then no other religion, no other methods are needed. Love itself becomes your god, your ultimate experience.

Life changes through understanding. And if you love, love has an alchemy of its own. If love cannot change the other person, it only means you don’t know what love is; you must be misunderstanding something else for love, because love is absolutely capable of changing people. In fact, it is the only way to change.

There is no place where love is being taught. There is no place where love is being nourished. That is one of the functions of the mystery school: to make your love pure, pure of ego and power and domination — just a sheer gift of joy, a delight in the being of the other person, just a sharing of all that you have, holding nothing back.

Love is the greatest magic.

Don’t be afraid of the other; let the other enter your life. I don’t teach escapism. I teach you to go into the world, to transform the world, because only in that transformation will you be transformed. By escaping to the hills and to the monasteries you will miss transformation yourself. You will shrink, you will not expand.

The more you love, the more you have it. The more you give, the more the universe goes on pouring into you from all sides. There are hidden springs, just as in a well. Love has an underground way of filling you, invisible.

The only way to know is just give it and see — you are always full.

Sunday, January 22, 2012

My God Child's Grandmother

I had a really great day today that I just can't help but share. I've spent time this wk end with a close school friend, who I was bridesmaid for and am god parent to her son. I just love him, there is such a strong friendship between us, we get each other, he's 4 and SUCH a cutie! 

It's been an 'interesting' journey with this extended family over the past year. I have a lot of love for this friend's mother, aka my godson's grandmother. She's an attractive, refined, always looking her best, proper English lady; life is black and white and orderly and routined; man marries woman and families happen and that's life at it's best.

The wedding of her daughter was the most important occasion, as part of the wedding party there were many duties, like making sure all the chocolate hearts were prepared and packaged the right way up, flowers arranged in certain ways, the bridesmaid dress had to be delivered to her house a week prior so she could have it dry cleaned and pressed. As a professional event organiser, I actually really do respect and love a fellow event perfectionist. So safe to say we hit it off on that occasion, I was right into her style!

Her father as well actually, we spent the night before the wedding drinking port and discussing the pro's and con's of Australia becoming a Federation. He was a CEO of a large Australian financial institution, and truly give me a business / political based discussion any day...pig in mud!!!

These relationships were further developed at the christening of my friend's child, when I became god parent. At this point I believe my friend's mother was of the belief that my gay identity could be nothing more than just a phase....well she was kind of correct ... doo de doo!! :-/

Now fast forward 10 years and how to broach what the bleep is happening in 'Anna's life' ... *gulp!* 

I'm not sure I can say this all unfolded in the best way it could have but it's been what it has. My friend in support of me agreed to be part of my madison article and offer a wedding pic - those of you who read it probably would recall. I did ask her at the time, "what have you told your mother?" ... her response which also felt right for me "at this point it's unlikely she'll come across madison and honestly I'm not entirely sure she'll understand so let's just leave it for now". Agreed, why make something out of nothing, our friendship and love for each other was concrete and this felt all that was needed for now...however...

what are the chances ... mother dearest was up in Noosa a few months later on holiday getting her hair done, and has THAT month's madison magazine placed on her lap to peruse! YEP! Apparently there were significant profanities that came out during that appointment ...dying to be a fly on the wall much! To be honest as much as we are compassionate foremost, my friend and her brother and I couldn't help but find it all a bit humorous! The hair salon still remembers her to this day!

I didn't hear all the details, as my dear friend sheltered me somewhat from what this brought up in her mother; a lot of judgement and confusion I understand, but ultimately a sadness that she didn't feel she could be told, which for us I guess was the truth.

Fast forward to now...4 months post this discovery and my god I tell you, I really do have a lot of love for this woman. I believe she has calmed the judgemental tone of conversation ... she has still blurted out comments over the Christmas lunch table, which could be considered a tad inappropriate. But she has taken a big interest to try understand more, and has recently recorded Chaz Bono's doco on foxtel to watch and learn. And today I got a very big well wish via my friend that she hoped my visit to play with the kids was going well and that I was happy and healthy. 

My friend and I are just in awe of her and have a lot of proudness for her willingness to come to terms and offer love! Ultimately my fear was that there would be some concern for me continuing a relationship with my godson of which there is none, we play, laugh, I teach him how to spike his hair with product, and just have that natural human bonding time.

This may all come up one day with him when he's older and I guess that'll be something to open into then. For now I'm just grateful for this family love (beyond my supportive brother) that is coming my way.

Thanks life, this has been a special day! I just love him!!

Thursday, January 19, 2012

The First Exhibit Opening

So I quite enjoyed that exhibition opening; after a last minute re-create of one of the works and not really knowing what or who to expect, it was quite the fun evening out. I felt very lucky to have had the support of a lot of friends who came along and giggled a lot with me.

I think the funniest conversation of the eve was with an old work colleague (as in she's not old but the work connection is) ...

strangely enough after this experience I think we're a little closer, clearly we are art connoisseurs;

Paddy "Ok so you're seeming a little out of your head right now, let's do the loop and focus on the art pieces and see what we think of everything"
Andy "Ye-ah good plan"
Paddy "So these photos are interesting, they're just pinned up with a magnet"
Andy "Ye-ah I have no idea what I"m looking at, it's just dark with a few white squiggles, is this art? what do think this white light squiggle is about"
Paddy "Not sure but they haven't even been cut straight, do you think that's planned or just laziness?"
Andy "Looks like laziness to me, but Paddy really, what am I looking at?"
Paddy "I don't really know but the title here has galactic in it, maybe it's space related"
Andy "No no, ah no, look, Paddy that's a vagina, see?"
Paddy "Ah yes yes it is, rightio"
Andy "hmm should we move on?"
Paddy "Sure, oh look this one has the nipple" ... ... .

PERFECT work colleague conversation...don't you think?!?!

This aside, the evening was filled with a lot of artistic love, the curator shared how much they wanted to promote me and my artistic party (aka Sally Flegg & Lynne O'Brien) as the feature artists for the entire festival...chuffed much! She just said we just needed a few more pieces and for them to be a little larger ...

"Well I'm sure we can make my head bigger next time if required" 

Funny too I get that note all the time in my performance work too - "go bigger" 


Fabulous feedback from the public, who struggled to comprehend how it wasn't all photo-shop 

"No that's a zipper stuck to my head"

They also stated that the work was by far the most superior in the place and was radiating a really strong energy. So this was really beautiful feedback for someone who still feels very green in an art space which isn't performance based.

The exhibit is up for the next three weeks at 1000 Pound Bend Gallery, Little Lonsdale St, so if you're in Melbourne city, pop in for a squiz!

And onwards and upwards from this experience...a lot of new ideas have presented themselves for future exhibits both Queer and Mainstream, as well as a big dose of fresh inspiration from such a packed house of people who loved it. 

It was also really great to connect with fellow transmen in Melbourne and be part of the inaugural launch of Dude Magazine Australia, the only one of it's kind presenting trans-stories to the wider community. Look out for it in Sydney launching there on Feb 3!   

And finally here are some pics for those who weren't able to come along;

Andrew Guy in simplest terms used to be known as Anna Guy. A trans ’man’ currently living in Sydney, feels he exists in this life simply as a paradox which appears to be problematic for people and finds humour and quirk expressing this through art mediums.

Andrew is an actor / artist and human strongly influenced by a personal philanthropic vision. His recent acting work has raised awareness of living, self-healing, sexuality, gender, domestic violence and depression.  

Prior to this he performed in uniquely crafted staged events throughout South Africa; Moscow; London; Toronto and Hong Kong; and has received two Australian Excellence Awards for contribution to global relations and gen y mentoring.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Queer City Premier Arts: Reveal

Click here - Queer City Premier Arts: Reveal

These prints are the first sprouting of the idealogy ; "truth and authenticity" first and foremost in life. It will continue to evolve and open in ways not yet known as this female form to male form transition continues on it's striking, empowering, unknowing and attractive right of passage.

Midsumma 2012

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Midsumma Festival - Let's Play!!!

Dear friends,

I zoot off to Melbourne town next week to exhibit and sell the first in a series of photographic prints at the Midsumma Festival. Hugest love to Sally Flegg and Lynne O'Brien who made this happen with me, along with Jez Pez and DUDE Magazine who helped get us on board - wish us luck!!!

I'll also be honoring and supporting fellow creatives, celebrating their art forms; 
'this humanity' at its quirkiest, finest, courageousness and lovableness. 

Here's to humanity and not tolerating diversity but honoring and celebrating it till the day it's all over! 
If you're around town and we get to play, lucky us!! 

In addition a dear friend Gavin Roach is performing his solo show 'Confessions of a Grindr Addict
so please if you feel up for a funny and endearing night out pop along to his show!
It certainly won't disappoint!!

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

The Merten Effect

I just wanted to put these on this blog for mainly my own record ... this is what I'm hearing today (if I ever forget and need reminding with future challenges...aka a minimally scarred arm after phallo surgery)

NOTE TO SELF: I guess it didn't matter that other trans people did their utmost to stop me speaking about this on forums and youtube channels by blocking me and judging  that what I had to say was wrong ... the truth always gets to where it needs to go;

Andrew - this was SO helpful: thank you! I saw that Dr a couple of months ago and my surgery is booked for April, but I have serious reservations about her for the reasons you mentioned. Good on you for shopping around: you've inspired me to do the same :). Well done, and congratulations on the outcome: you look fantastic!

hey I'm just watching your surgery video wow mate just wow that is amazing, i'm sooooo happy you spoke about those things honestly you have shown such courage. i guess if i had the amount of persistence, courage and encouragement from more of the community i probably would have taken more time and questioned more surgeons...thanks for making the video i truly hope people follow in your footsteps and do what's right for them

i'm passing those doctor's details onto my son(s)

I'm flying up to Sydney soon to have a consult with that doctor and am going to see if I can get a consultation with your one too. Thanks again :) 

Thanks Andy! You're the best! I'm super stoked I stumbled upon you actually, as most ftm's are usually quite androgynous or butch before they transition, and though I am not femme in any way, I look so much like a girl :( And you are the only other person I found that was quite feminine looking as such before you started ... ps Journey therapy sounds amazing

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